Gringo Tour 08/09 - Part 22

We woke up pretty late (again) as we had been out till about 3:30am. I managed to get downstairs to breakfast before it shut. Again - I was feeling a whole lot more functional than Ant - who was having a bit of a chill in our hotel room.

I think we managed to leave the hotel after midday - and Ant needed a bit more grease in his diet in order to function properly - so we headed to... (cue dramatic music),,, Mc Donalds at Zona Rosa. Well - I guess it has been a bit of a recurring theme in Mexico of poor, slow servicio. Our experience at Mc Donalds managed to win our dubious award of "Worst. Service. Ever.".

We ordered a couple of meals - I did a Big Mac meal (the shame - I hadn't eaten a Big Mac since... well I can't remember) and Ant ordered some Mexican equivalent of a Mc Feast meal... OK - so there was nothing abnormal about our order (no burgers less meat or cheese requests) - just a burger, a coca light and some chips. Mexican Mc Donalds have this crazy set-up where there was one person serving the tills and customers, one person cooking the food and one person mopping the kitchen floor. When you order - you pay and get handed a receipt. Then you have to wait about 10 minutes before your luke-warm Big Mac appears with a Coke. They just sit the burgers out on the counter (sometimes with fries) so they get really cold really quickly. The woman tried to serve me some fries which had been sitting out on the counter for about 10 minutes. I refused to take them and did some "sign language" to try and explain that the chips were as cold as Heather Locklear's heart. She sort of gave me an evil eye - and eventually took away the chips. I sat down with my lukewarm burger (despite it being cooked fresh...?) and diet coke - ate the meal and then loitered around the counter waiting for my chips (this was about 15 minutes after I had paid for my meal). She gave me another death stare and said something in Spanish mentioning that she would grudgingly bring the chips over when they were ready. Meanwhile - there are customers everywhere and only three staff in the restaurant (with one of them still busily mopping the kitchen floor). The woman serving customers was still walking around the front of the shop at a snail's pace - not really seeming to care about anyone's predicament or food.

I sat back down at the table with Ant and began plotting my revenge. I was thinking - maybe I could throw a few gurkins at her on my way out... or I was thinking about pouring my drink everywhere (but that would mean the innocent mopper lady would take the flack - not that beetch behind the counter). But finally - about 20 minutes after we ordered our meals - we finally got the chips... Yay... cough.

We head to the metro for what was a huge long trip out to the sticks. It also involved a separate tram trip (which was 20 pesos a ticket) and about 40m touts on the train. We were heading out to the "Venice" of Mexico City - Xochimilco (there is no way in hell I want to attempt to pronounce that!). We get off the tram (sort of out in the sticks of Mexico City) and it felt a little touristy with touts on bicycles trying to court our business. We ignored them and attempted to interpret the LP map so we could make our way to the "canal boat terminal". LP said that you need not pay more than the signposted prices - which read "160 pesos per boat per hour not per person". Although the sign was En Espanol - I could still read it (despite me not taking a lesson in Spanish). We then had boat operators attempting to sell us a boat for 200 pesos for an hour per person... Que?! This all felt like our first holiday rip off - and although we aren't talking about heaps of money - I think it was more the principle than anything else. We were about to hop on a boat when the guy said 160 pesos - but then we realised he was going to rip us off and charge us for 2 lots of 160 pesos. We walked away - only to be touted by another guy who went down to 200 pesos for the boat not per person. We were getting ripped by 40 pesos - but we didn't want to come out all this way (90 minute train/tram ride) all for nothing...

We decided on a 60 minute ride (which ended up being plenty enough). The canals of Xochimilco are a little swampy/Disneyland Critter County - but they were filled to the brim of these ramshackle boats with big styrofoam front thingys. Each boat has a "gondola" driver person who rows the boat - somewhat unmerrily down the stream. The traffic on the canals were some what unbelievable. Being NYs Day - I think every man, woman and child were out here hiring boats and having picnics. The driving ability of the gondolas felt a bit like the driving ability of taxi drivers here in Mexico - pick a lane, any lane - and don't bother sticking with that lane for too long. There were even these little boats who would tout you food, beer, cocktails, flowers, toys and anything else you could possibly not want. There were even floating Mariachis...

Anyway - by the end of the trip - I was happy that I had experienced this - but also happy that we didn't book the boat out for 2 hours. There was a sign on the boat (well it was just written on the side with a magic marker) - which roughly translated into "Bribes please 50 pesos". We think it had meant "gratitude" not a "bribe". On one hand we felt a little ripped handing over more money after being ripped in the first place - but then we felt a bit sorry for the driver (who probably doesn't make much of a cut out of the money) - so Ant gave him the 50 pesos.

We headed back into town (again on the tram and train). We both managed to score seats on the tram on the way back. On the way to Xochimmilco - I had felt a bit guilty about taking a seat when there were lots of pregnant woman standing up... but there were all of these precocious obese woman who didn't offer up their seats - so I didn't feel all that bad. On Mexican public transport -there doesn't seem to be much in the way of rules (other than no big bags or no fumar) - kids seem to freely occupy seats when there are old decrepit people still standing. Speaking about no fumar - the no smoking in restaurants, bars and public areas is pretty amazing in Mexico. We were expecting to be stinking of it everywhere - but you can go out to a club in Mexico and not smell like you have made love to an ashtray afterwards.

I really wanted to go see a movie in Mexico (just to see what it would be like) - and all adult movies (not the blue ones) are in Engrish - only kiddie films are dubbed. We checked out the listing at the cinema at the Reforma 222 plaza. The ticket prices were cheap (about $5AUD) and I had decided to go see some Keanu Reeves alien movie - but Ant didn't feel like coming. Before the session - we both had Dominos at the food court (the additional shame) and I went to the cinema. It was "Cinemex" and it all seemed brand spanking new. The seats were relatively comfortable and the theatre was moderately full. When the trailers started to show - I was a little bit anxious because they were showing a trailer for "Marley y Yo" which was dubbed... However - that must have been a kids movie because the rest were subtitled.

The movie was OK - it was a bit of a message movie about global warming (I think?) but it was a bit predictable with a dumbish ending. Not to mention that Keanu was well type-cast - playing an alien sin emotions...

When I got back to the hotel - Ant's "I don't want to see a movie" mood had changed and he wanted to see the latest Woodies Allen movie. I was mentioning that he might be at risk at seeing a movie that could be 'En Espanol" - but he went anyway. Although it was a western movie - there were scenes in it that was "En Espanol" with sin engrish subtitles - so Ant found it a little confusing in parts... but it wasn't really his sort of film. xo xo gossip girl.