People’s Republic of Sugary Buns in China Part 22 – Day 16 - Xi'an - Terracotta Warriors

We woke up to some “Rio Bus Fire” action on BBC World. Yeah – I remember harping on about how safe Rio was and how LP exaggerated the threat level back in the Sth America blog – but I didn't think we were expecting gangs to “open a can of whoopa$$” in a big way to bus passengers…

For breakfast – we went to Parkson (an Asian department store) for some really sugary buns (my god I’m still feeling the effects from these buns 2 weeks later)… You could even get cocktails with your sugary buns at Parkson – no joke. “I’ll have a “Slow Screw Against The Wall” with a Croissant please?”

Our mission for today in Xi’an was to check out the Terracotta Warriors (you know – that ancient tomb full of terracotta warriors discovered by a farmer in a well - back in the 70s). But fearing the expensive rip off tours – we decided that we might attempt to catch a local bus that goes to the TW Museum. We were feeling rather brave following our near death experience at the local bus the day before.

We walked from Parkson to Xi’an Central Train Station (which looks like any Central Station in China – very communistic!). We wandered around for 15 minutes trying to find the right bus to catch – but in a bit of a role reversal – I found the right bus (just as Ant was about to give up and catch a taxi).

The bus was very cosy (aka Deep Vein Thrombosis inducing) added with the fact that it was also very bumpy (aka Spinal Injury inducing). However it was a cheap ride (7 yuan or $1.10 AUD per person). On the way to the TW Museum – there were numerous “Counterfeit Terracotta Warrior Shops” (real name!) and a sort of quasi replication of the Sphinx and the Gaza Pyramids (which left both Ant and I pretty clueless).

We were dropped off at the “Terracotta Warrior Carpark Mall” where we had to fend off several touts trying to sell us noodles and other various shi#e. But you gotta love that name…

If the “Terracotta Warrior Carpark Mall” was bad enough – you ain’t seen nothin until you’ve experienced the “International Terracotta Warrior Mall” – which was about one kilometre and a half of sprawling, mission brown and completely empty shops. I’m sure this development was sort of new – but because of the Chinese Cultural and Architectural Timewarp of 30 years – you might have thought it was built in the late 70’s. Mike Brady from the Brady Bunch would have been proud. I’m sure the developers have gone bust or something – which is a pretty telling sign (in my opinion) of the Chinese construction boom at the moment. Overdevelopment is everywhere (even if there isn’t any demand) – and I’m sure a bubble is going to burst a la 1997 Thailand style soon… And another hilarious thing about the “ITWM” was that all the shops were selling the same crap (tacky terracotta warrior replicas and snow cones).

After walking through the 2 kilometre walk through the Carpark Mall and the ITWM, there was a shuttle at the end of the ITWM to the entrance of the Museum for 2 yuan (although it only takes you about 50 meters). Despite being only 2 yuan – we just walked the 50 meters…

Ant and I were a little concerned about how much it would cost to get into the Terracotta Warriors (being one of the premier tourist sites in China) – and were willing to fork out a couple of hundred yuan each to get in. However to our shock – entry was only 65 yuan (just under $11 AUD) – so it was hella cheap…

The TW Museum or Archeological Site is a bit of a “work in progress”. They are still excavating two out of the three pits in the site and there are thousands of Chinese minions painstakingly putting together the warriors/horses, etc – which is taking a lot of time.

Ant decided to heed the Thorn Tree (Lonely Planet’s forum site) advice and see “Pit 3” first, then “Pit 2” and “Pit 1” last. This is because if you see the Pit 1 first – you might be under-whelmed by the rest of the Pits.

That said – although Pit 3 was smallish – it was still impressive with detailed calvery and horses. Pit 2 (at about 8 times the size of Pit 1) was massive – but less put together than 3. Pit 2 contained a cool “mini-museum” containing some of the highlights including the “Knelling Archer” and Officers. Some of the detail on the warriors were incredible (for their age) – a lot of the statues have different features than one another – giving you the impression that they are individuals (not very communistic guys!).

Pit 1 was about the size of Pit 2 but was excavated. It contains the famous masses of army infantry. Although it was a little bit like a mosh pit to get the best view – it was worth it. It would be really fascinating to revisit the TW Museum in 20 years from now to see how much additional work has been done in the site (eg: excavated and reassembling the warriors).

Because of the cheap ticket price to get into the museum – we decided to fork out some extra cold hard yuan for an audio tour. I think I’d rather listen to a Yanni Live in Concert CD – the woman on the audio tour had a complete personality bypass and was like listening to paint dry (if there is such a thing)… Another problem with the audio tour was the extreme temperatures in Xi’an that day. It was cold cold cold and none of the Pits are air-conditioned. In order to function the audio tour – you need to use your fingers (gloveless) – and it was so hella cold – I’ve pretty much lost the use of my fingertips since that day.

We concluded our visit to the TW Museum by checking out the “Exhibition Hall” (also keeping up with the unconditioned theme of the TW Museum). There was some temporary exhibit which was all in Chinese and another huge moshpit to see the famous chariots. I pretty much had to shoulder charge a Chinese guy in order to get a looksee at the thing for a second. We accidentally went to the exhibit on the “Administration of the TW Museum” – which had to be the most shameless bit of self promotion I’d seen for a while. At Chinese tourist sites – they love showing the famous (and not so famous) people who have visited previously. Damn Bill Clinton – how did he and Hillary and that small Clinton get into the Pit on the lower level amongst the warriors?? Chinese tourist sites also love showing Presidents of obscure countries (Hello Turkistan!). This exhibit was no exception.

On our way back to the bus (via the ITWM) – there were people trying to sell us animal skins by shouting out “Hello! Animals!” – animal skins aren’t high on my shopping list – no thanks!

When we arrived back into town – I started to feel nauseous. What better place to eat when you are nauseous than KFC!... ahem… Ant and I are becoming fast food connoisseurs here in China (the shame) – and we both came to the conclusion that KFC was hella better than Mc Donalds – although their “Spicy” burgers aren’t really spicy and they did serve us some weird orange cordial drink rather than coke…

After a big day (and me not feeling well) – we went back to the hotel where I rested and watched a Monkey Magic movie (or the last 20 minutes of it). They were all played by different people than the TV show – and at least Tripitaka was played by a man. The production values in the movie made Monkey look like an extra in the 60s version of Planet of the Apes – and I don’t remember Monkey in the TV kid’s show calling women “whores!”…?! Another television highlight was the “World Juggling Federation” on ESPN. Perhaps the ESPN Ocho from the movie “Dodgeball” really exists??!

After a rest – we did some more “Sushi Train” at a nearby Sushi Restaurant. Although there weren’t heaps of “Mushi Mushi!” and Japanese kitsch – they did have a better selection of food than Guilin and it was cheaper too – which always means a plus in my books.